Beyoncé Endorses New Technology

Everyone knows that the best way to advance a new product is to get an international superstar like Beyoncé to promote it. Usually the plug is simply through an advertisement, but here is an example of an artist compromising their work to endorse a product directly through their music. I wouldn't be surprised if everyone had a videophone by the end of 2010 because of this song. Except for a little help for Lady Gaga, Beyoncé appears to be working solo, but could Skype be the brains behind this operation?

Beatboxing with a Flute

Flutes are the oldest instruments in the world. The first flute ever was made out of a bear's femur and dates back to 43,000 years ago. Today flutes continue to carry on a great classical music tradition. However, the flute's precious reputation for being included in orchestral compositions has been tainted with beatboxing.

This video uploaded on Youtube in 2006 demonstrates the flute being used in a "street" style fashion, and the song is from a video game nonetheless!


Where is Mozart and The Magic Flute?

As a flautist I am deeply concerned that the credibility one gains from the knowledge of flute playing will be diminished because it is now becoming a common skill of the street.

The future of the flute's rep is bleak :(


haha jk, i think flute beatboxing is really cool xP

THE FUTURE OF CHASTITY

After watching this discouraging game of "suck and blow" I question where chastity will weigh on the future scale of moral consciousness. Tiger Woods, "golf- star" must have something to say on this subject.

I am worried that we will revert to our primitive past.

Has Oprah Run Out of Favorite Things??

First she giveth, then she taketh away.

Oprah Winfrey, Queen of the talkshow hostesses, will not be giving away her favorite things this Thanksgiving. Though she claims she will be hosting the famed episode this year, it will not occur in the fourth week of November. This news may come as a shock, but if we look back over the years we can see the decline. Hindsight is always 20/20.

"Oprah's Favorite Things" has been a tradition on the show since 2002 when she first gave the audience all her favorite products of that year. Over the years, Oprah has continued to shower her fans with lavish gifts, including laptops, diamond watches, ugg boots, ipods, perfume by Sarah Jessica Parker, you name it--big O's given it away.

Everything was runny smoothly until 2008. In an effort to seem frugal in the face of the national economic crisis, Oprah decided to take a more "D.I.Y." approach to her favorite things. Her gifts were things such as, treasure boxes filled with momentos, gift baskets of fruits and vegetables from your own garden, and time with loved ones. What is the world coming to? Oprah Winfrey can't even spoil her audience anymore!

But it gets worse my dear reader. After last year's sucky gift crisis, Oprah has now cancelled her usual Thanksgiving week giveaway and is re-scheduling her Favorite Things episode for later this year. You just can't change an institution like that. What about tradition? What about integrity? Has Oprah lost her edge? I hope you keep an eye on Oprah as we enter the holiday season, I know I will.

High Security Cereal

"Kelloggs Future Flakes"

Future scholar, Melissa Finkelstein has called our attention to Kelloggs' cutting edge advancements for cereal. Apparently there are too many imitation flakes out there, and the Corn Flakes® company has had enough. Soon Kelloggs will be releasing a limited edition run of cereals that features their logo, laser cut into every bite. If all goes well with the test, a few of these copyrighted flakes will go into every box.

Your Wish Has Come True

Watch out high school girls who dress up for 80s day, your wish has come true. Shoulder pads are back in style, which means in the future you will find them embedded in your corduroy blazer from Hollister and there's nothing you can do about it.




Givenchy, Ready to Wear, Fall/Winter 2009

Alexander Wang, Fall 2009

Make sure you check out The Future WAS Scary too!

Dippin' Dots

a robot waits, it serves you the future

It's hard to picture what food will be like in the years to come, but we can catch a glimpse of the future with Dippin' Dots. The treat is created by flash freezing a syrupy ice cream mix with liquid nitrogen. These tiny orbs of frozen confection even come with the slogan "ice cream of the future." If this beaded food trend takes off, we may see some drastic changes to our diet.

dinner?

Time to Take a Dip Manhattan!

Customization

Our conception of craft is changing!

No More Mice!

Say goodbye to your beloved computer mouse because Microsoft, in collaboration with the University of Washington and the University of Toronto, are vaporizing them by way of EMG (electromyography?). Basically, through the use of sensors your PC will be able to sense finger and arm gestures. So now you will be able to play air Guitar Hero. 

Just be sure you don't hit a chord while playing that requires you to do this:

Or else it might get cranky:

Virtual Pop Stars

Kyoko Date [1996]

E-Cyas [2000]

The Japanese company HoriPro Entertainment developed "Kyoko Date" back in 1996. Though she had CGI brains, and binary code for DNA she still managed to release two singles and record a music video or two. After lagging behind a couple years, the Germans struck back in 2000 with E-Cyas, or Electronic Cybernetic Artificial Superstar, the first male virtual star. He was only a one hit wonder, but in his prime this cyber-stud received 100 emails daily from fans.

This progressive model for entertainment seems to have lost some steam over the years, but it's certainly due for a comeback. With mainstream music in need of a renaissance and technology progressing daily, it seems like the perfect time for a digitally engineered, flawless supertalent to steal the spotlight.

Further reading:

Kyoto

E-Cyas

Electronics That Dissolve into Your Body

Traditionally medical electronics need to be encased while in the body to protect them from the body. However, with this new silicon-silk electronic interface the device will melt into your body tissue due to the silk.

You may ask why this concerns you if you're young and healthy and I will now tell you why:

LED TATTOOS!
Yes, well Brian Litt a professor of neurology and bioengineering at the University of Pennsylvania is developing silicon silk LEDs to act as tattoos that will interface with the nervous system and also show diabetics their blood-sugar readings. But we all know that if these things really end up working there's no doubt that they'll become a staple of every strip club in 50 years.

Source: Technology Review

MINDFLEX

This new toy from mattel allows you to control a ball using the power of your mind. I feel the game speaks for itself. Enjoy

Glacier Surfing

Forget ocean waves, in the future we'll all be surfing collapsing glaciers. In the never-ending search for the most dangerous rush, big wave surfers have turned to arctic avalanches. Sure it looks dangerous now, but in a few years any 10 year old will be able to pull a stunt like this. Finally, something good is coming out of global warming. Maybe this "green" fad is coming to an end.

Face Transplants

In November 2005 the first person to receive a partial face transplant was Isabelle Dinoire of France. She had overdosed on sleeping pills after having "a very upsetting week, with many personal problems" and passed out on her floor after hitting a piece of furniture on her way. Her labrador retriever, named Tania, became frantic after finding her on the floor and started scratching and clawing at her face in order to wake her up. Upon awakening, Dinoire's lower half of her face was completely destroyed due to the dog's damage. Sadly the dog was euthanized after the incident and ironically Dinoire bought another dog shortly after to aid her in recovery. Six Months later she received the first face transplant. 

Dinoire post surgery

Dinoire said she feels a sisterhood with the donor because the donor had also attempted suicide like Dinoire, however, was successful. In a 2008 interview with Dinoire she stated that she still struggles with getting used to looking at someone else's face in the mirror. Since Dinoire's successful surgery a handful more of people have also received facial transplants.

ps. try turning off the light!

Floating Heels

Marjan Pejoski via Jak & Jil Blog

These high heels without the heels have been becoming a popular footwear choice at fashion events around the globe since 2008. Although their history was started by Andre Perugia in the 1930s the current reincarnations of them look significantly more scary than the originals.

An American pair from the 1950s

When worn not only do they give onlookers the illusion that you are walking on air, but they also change the way that one walks resulting in more dainty and feminine steps.

No Mirror Necessary

What does your camera say about you? student, hobbyist, professional?... how about myspace self-portrait EXPERT? Now there is a camera just for you! The Samsung TL225 has an additional screen on it's front so that self-portraits are no longer a guessing game. There are even 12 megapixels of image quality to capture every pore on your face. Amidst these self-referential features is a "child mode" which plays animations on the front screen to distract your little one as you snap away.

Xbox Project Natal

This thing is so much more than a gaming console, it is a life console. Microsoft would like to see an Xbox Natal in every home. Probably so they can watch everyone with those cameras. The future is scary!

WELCOME TO THE FUTURE

Hey you, you've found it. The first post of "The Future is Scary." But guess what? The future was always scary. This future web artifact is an attempt to sort through the overwhelming amount of information out there to bring you the facts about the future throughout the centuries. "What was the mid-19th century future like," you ask? Well read on, and maybe you will find out. Well not right now, of course...but in the Future!